Are you single and do your best to ignore it, with a fantasy that flickers in the back of your mind that there maybe a Valentine’s card from a secret admirer on the door step, even though you know it’s a ridiculous fantasy?
Are you married or in a relationship and expect the disappointment of no card or pressie.
Whatever the reason it’s not nice to be Dreading Valentines Day.
Especially when it’s in every shop window and all around you.
Last year I found myself single coming up to Valentine’s Day.
A couple of weeks before the day I was fantasising as to what I would like to happen on Valentine’s Day.
I found myself smiling when I was imagining a beautiful bouquet of roses being delivered on the day and a card arriving in the post with a thoughtful romantic message within it.
I was great at imagining my perfect day…
I imagined a man spoiling me on the Day, taking me to my favourite restaurant and showering me with love, attention and affection.
I let myself sink into what that would feel like, receiving all that attention and love.
And then I got to thinking what it would be like if I gave myself a wonderful Valentine’s day, rather than dreading valentines day.
What would it feel like to shower myself with love and to spoil ‘me’?
And so I engaged my boy energy into organising a Valentine’s Day that would be wonderful.
I spent the next two weeks fantasising about the Day.
I imagined every minute of the day from the moment I woke up.
I could feel myself getting more and more excited about the forthcoming day as I ordered flowers to be delivered, planned my shopping trip and wrote a list of my favourite foods to eat.
Picking out the Valentine’s card was a surprisingly great experience, reading through the different verses and messages. I finally chose one that summed up exactly how I felt about myself.
I felt happy whenever I thought about the day, I noticed myself smiling as I imagined how it would go. I started to really look forward to it.
And so the day came …
It started with a cup of tea in bed while I opened my card and the present I had bought myself. I put on one of my favourite dresses and felt great when I left the house for town.
I did some shopping, buying a couple of lovely indulgent presents for myself and then headed to my favourite cafe for lunch.
It was full with Valentine’s couples enjoying afternoon tea and so I was offered a seat in the window at the ‘breakfast bar’.
It wasn’t what I had imagined but I went with it, almost immediately remembering the fabulous menu and gorgeous cakes they served.
I was settling myself in and suddenly noticed a man standing next to me.
He’d arrived just before me and had been taken too to the ‘breakfast bar’.
He was asking me if he could join me.
I felt hesitant when I took in how he looked. He was not at all my ideal date, and at the same moment I felt excited.
I had a split second to decide and I am so glad I said ‘Yes, I would feel great if you would join me’.
I had a wonderful lunch.
He had already ordered a sharing platter which he offered to share and I went ahead and ordered a couple of interesting dishes for us both to try.
I leant back and felt myself soften and melt and allowed myself to experience the moment.
We talked and shared stories. We tried all the dishes and ordered the biggest slices of cake for dessert.
And at the end we hugged and went our separate ways.
I didn’t feel I wanted to see him again.
That didn’t stop me from having one of the loveliest lunches I have ever had, where I felt special, with attention and compliments being showered over me.
When I got home there was the bunch of beautiful white roses that I’d ordered on the doorstep.
That turned out to be a very special day for me, one I will always remember.
I showed myself how important I was to me, how much I loved me, how much I appreciated myself AND I attracted a man to ask me to join him for lunch.
You know, he told me that he had never done anything like that before and he didn’t know why he had done it.
He said he found himself asking me before he’d had any time to think about it.
So, what are you going to plan for Your Valentine’s Day…